Sexual Passion: What is It and How to Keep it Alive?

What is sexual passion? Is it based on love, or are they from two different spheres?

10 Oct 2022 INSIGHTS

What is sexual passion? Is it based on love, or are they from two different spheres?

Many people also confuse the relationship between sexual passion and intimacy. Unsurprisingly, strong sexual desire is among the many factors that can deepen the intimacy level.  However, sexual love differs from sex drive, while many still assume the two terms are interchangeable. 

In this blog post, we’ll unravel anything you need to know about sexual passion, from the definition of what components define sexual desire, its relation to physical intimacy, and finally, how to keep your sexual power up.

Defining Sexual Passion

Sexual passion is often a strong tendency to engage in sexual activity. It stemmed from a strong positive connection with such an activity, including the belief that it's important and valued.

People with high sexual passion often pursue the activity on a long-term basis. Interestingly, this doesn't always mean they also seek romantic love when engaged in sexual activity.

This suggests that sexual passion and deep-rooted emotions are two different things. Many agree that affection and love are something in addition. That said, if you are one of those who are more sexually passionate – you may often have the ability to build intimacy and finally bring in a romantic relationship much more quickly.

The Sexual Passion Triangle

This section is for you if you feel like you lack sexual passion. There are three main components of sexual desire, which can hopefully help you better understand which of the areas you need to improve.

Thrill

Thrill refers to the indescribable sense of excitement and titillating anticipation. Unfortunately, thrill tends to fade over time, which can be a problematic for people engaged in a committed relationship. Imagine you're on a train, going home after a long week of a business trip, knowing that your partner is waiting for you at the train station.

You've missed your partner terribly and didn't want to see them empty-handed. So, you prepared a small surprise – your mind starts to wander, and questions begin to pop up. 

Will, your partner like the present? What if they don’t? How will they react?  You have the confidence that they will like your gift and you find yourself smiling from the imagination. As you finally spot them waving at you and smiling at you. These little things – all of a sudden – you feel a small rush of thrill in your body and emotions. 

Many believe that thrill doesn't last forever. But it's a big old myth. As an awakened lover, you will learn that even if the joy does fade for many couples, it doesn't need to be that way for you.  You will learn to get mindful and see your partner with fresh eyes.  Then, what is old becomes new and you will fall in love all over again. 

Intimacy

Intimacy includes a deep sense of knowing and being understood. It develops over time through shared vulnerabilities and deepening inner connections. Intimacy can be:

  • Emotional.
  • Spiritual.
  • Physical.
  • Intellectual.
  • Experiential.

Intimate partners trust each other, allowing them to share joys and sorrows. They also make efforts to deepen and refresh the connection. This lets them see their imperfect partner and relationship with much more clarity. 

Therefore, it's fair to say that real intimacy takes time. If you feel like you've known your blind date all your life, you may fall into a false sense of familiarity. That early sense of connection is not the real thing. It sure feels lovely, but it's just your projection of fantasies towards the stranger sitting at the other side of the table. 

Let’s look at the seven ingredients of real intimacy:

  • Trust. Let your partner know you're trustworthy. This can help your partner get closer to you.
  • Acceptance. When you feel like your partner accepts you for who you are, it's when you know some intimacy has been established
  • Safety. Intimacy enables people to feel safe enough to risk their hearts. It provides a kind of reassurance that the other person cares.
  • Honesty. It's about knowing that your partner is all ears for any time you share something personal. This includes feeling comfortable telling hard truths.
  • Compassion. It's when you feel cared about. For example, you know your partner has your back during bad days.
  • Affection. Refers to the unspoken ways you show up for each other, like when your partner cooks for you when you're not feeling 100%.
  • Communication. Without a doubt, it's the key to a healthy relationship.

Sensuality

The sensuality spectrum includes the romantic, sexual, and erotic connections between partners. During a sensual energy exchange, the five physical senses become more sensitive. The moment may start with intertwined fingers and prolonged eye contact during a fancy dinner.

As you arrive home, those light touches and somewhat innocent glances progress into something spicier. Kissing and hugging are the most essential things we can think of happening in such a situation.  But let's not forget how it often calls for nibbling your partner's ear or savouring the taste of your partner’s skin. 

Hitting the bedroom, the sensual exploration can range from the sweetest, most gentle, soul-shaking love-making to the hottest, most non-normative raw sex. There are almost limitless techniques that two hearts, minds, bodies, and souls can connect in the sensual landscape. 

It's also important to note that sensuality starts in the mind as well as the body. Our mind, which is our sixth sense, enables us to explore new ways to experience any possible sensual pleasure.

A Closer Look into the Relationship Between Sexual Passion and Physical Intimacy

When it comes to physical intimacy, we can refer to it as physical contact combined with emotional connectedness. The contact in reference includes tickling, caressing, massaging, and cuddling. 

To achieve physical intimacy, familiarity is a crucial factor. People who enjoy each other's company are more comfortable taking on affectionate physical contact, leading to increased intimacy.

Furthermore, a deep level of intimacy also enables two people to build trust and understanding. This creates a special kind of bond that makes them feel at ease, or in the more cliché way, at home.

As a result, the two can show affection using their body, often in the most creative ways. Physical intimacy may also progress to public displays of affection. Those involved in such an activity like others to know how they are so into each other. Holding hands, hugging, and kissing are some of the most common ways people display physical intimacy.

We've learned that sexual passion can improve physical intimacy between partners. Also, we've found that intimacy is in the sexual passion triangle. 

Now, can physical intimacy maintain sexual passion?

In short, yes. 

As you and your partner develop a deeper level of intimacy, maintaining sexual passion is a piece of cake. As intimacy indicates the existence of something a bit more personal, it can increase the sexual passion towards the partner they feel intimate with. 

The need for physical intimacy is a natural part of human sexuality. Affectionate touches, especially during sex, release feel-good hormones like serotonin, oxytocin, and endorphins. Therefore, they help manage one's stress level. Without them, increased feelings of loneliness or sadness may present.

However, performing sensual touches require consideration. It calls for consent into one's personal space, as more often than not, they lead to sexual intercourse.  On a side note, physical intimacy is not always about sexual activities. If that's the case, the relationship is not sexually passionate. In a platonic relationship, for example, partners hug and give a kiss on the cheek to show you care.

What about Sex Drive?

Sex drive is synonymous with libido. It's about a person's desire to engage in sexual activity. Like sexual passion, libido can also be low or high. The terms are pretty self-explanatory. Low libido is a decreased sexual desire, whereas high libido is an increased desire for sex. 

Here are some factors causing low libido:

  • Age. While sexual desire fluctuates throughout, a study shows that one's libido slowly decreases starting at 60.
  • Mental health. Studies show that people with mental illnesses like anxiety and depression are at higher risk of experiencing a loss of sex drive. 
  • Obesity. As it increases the risk of sexual dysfunction, obese people may experience a loss of libido.
  • Menopause. Due to the decrease of sex hormones, female libido drops during menopause.

And here are several reasons for high libido:

  • Exercising. People engaging in physical activities, including cardio and weight lifting, tend to have a higher sex drive.
  • High testosterone consistency. Research shows that men have a higher libido than women due to higher testosterone.
  • Drug-taking. Stimulant drug consumption increases libido.

Tips for Keeping the Sexual Passion Alive

In the early days of a relationship, you may feel like you have sky-high sexual passion for your partner. You want to see your partner often and can't stop thinking about how wonderful this person is. Even thinking about your partner can make you aroused a bit.

You're not alone if you feel like the flame - or spark - dims over time. Many people struggle to keep their sexual passion alive. However, there are ways you can try to save it. Here are some tips:

  • Make time for intimacy. Consider scheduling a sexy time with your partner, as knowing when and where can build anticipation. Alternatively, you can invest in a weekly date, like a walk in the park or a brunch on a Sunday at 10.00 a.m. The general idea is to allow you and your partner to dress up, engage in meaningful conversation, and rebuild the connection.
  • Take time to take care of yourself. Think about how you tried hard to impress your partner in the early stage of your relationship by looking and smelling good. Changes certainly make sense once you have dated a long time or even moved in together. Having the opportunity to shower, brush our teeth, and put on perfume can help us feel good about ourselves and our time together. 
  • Don’t forget about each other’s kinks. Every one is unique in what they find sexually arousing. Therefore, try to be supportive, even if it feels weird at first! For example, if your partner has activity, or arousal to the sun’s rays, you can do it in your private backyard in the afternoon or the bedroom during the golden hours.
  • Understand differences. Like kinks, how much sex one needs is entirely individual. You, for example, want sex several times a week, while your partner wants only twice for the same period. For this reason, talking with your partner to shed light on this topic is crucial to better understand your partner’s views. 
  • Try new things every now and then. Sex can become more routine. And by routine, we mean monotonous. You know what you like as well as what your partner finds enjoyable, and thus how your sex becomes formulaic. In this case, having good sexual communication is the key to spicing it up. The good news is that if you don’t yet know what you like, then it’s a big journey ahead. If you find yourself feeling nervous doing it for the first time, just carry on. With practice, you’ll feel less anxious about it.

Final Words

Throughout this article, we’ve defined sexual passion, explain the sexual passion triangle, and share some tips to keep it alive. Also, we’ve looked further into physical intimacy and answered the question if sexual passion is the same as sex drive.

Keep in mind that flexibility is a crucial factor in sexual satisfaction. The level of pleasure, desire, eroticism, and satisfaction won’t be the same in every sex scene. We hope you’ve understood a bit more about sexual passion. If you still have questions, or just want to share your experiences, feel free to leave a comment!




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