Studies show that infidelity is prevalent in 20%-25% of all marriages, with an even split between men and woman.
The ‘term’ cheating however can mean different things to different people depending on their belief system. Regardless of this, the act of distrust can send a relationship into chaos and significantly impact a person’s mental health.
It’s not easy, but the act of cheating doesn’t necessarily mean that you need to automatically break up. If both parties are willing to do the work, to unpack the root cause of why the cheating occurred and work on themselves together and individually it can be an opportunity to grow and form a closer relationship.
Sometimes the signs might be obvious, and sometimes they are so small and easy to ignore. Here are some signs that may spark you to question if you partner is cheating on you.
They start to lose interest
Do you sense your partner is pulling away and losing interest in you? this can be shown through sexual intimacy, quality time and words.
Perhaps something is blocking their interest in you, and they may be seeking fulfilment elsewhere. It’s important to opening communicate with your partner and understand why the change in behaviour.
Your partner is experiencing erectile dysfunction
The causes of erectile dysfunction are limited their desire for you. It can be due to physical and phycological causes including:
There are many treatments available to support your partner in overcoming this issue. Perhaps the first place to start is encouraging your partner to speak to a doctor so they can find the root cause and the best treatment solutions for them. If they don’t feel comfortable going to see a doctor face to face, many tele-health services are available to undertake in the comfort of their home.
Showing that you support you partner is imperative as the issue can be uncomfortable and distressing for any man.
With all these factors in mind if there is no noticeable health reason why your partner might not be able to get or maintain an erection perhaps you may question if they are seeking sexual satisfaction elsewhere. This may lead them to feeling anxious or emotional distant from the relationship which can cause erectile dysfunction.
They masturbate without telling you
Masturbation is a very common and healthy thing to do alone or with your partner. A study found that 95% of men claim that they have masturbated at some point in their lives.
However, if they are doing it excessively and with use of porn this can be a sign of a bigger issue:
- Low satisfaction or desire to have sex with their partner
- Using it as a coping mechanism
- Shame / embarrassment
Excessive porn consumption can also lead to pathways in the brain being rewired causing premature ejaculation.
No longer initiating sex
When your partner is no longer initiating sex or even refusing to have sex this can be a sign that they are no longer satisfied sexually within the relationship. Alternatively, it could be you that no longer wishes to have sex them or meet their needs sexually.
This can be a result of many factors all of which don’t start or end with you. However, it’s important to unpack why, perhaps it is because:
- They no longer feel respected or wanted
- They are seeking validation elsewhere
- They desire mystery and novelty
Opening the conversation and created a safe space without judgement is key. It’s important to get to know one another’s needs sexually so you can better support one another.
Can being cheated on cause erectile dysfunction?
On the flip side if a man is being cheated this can have a detrimentally impact on their emotional state. Some symptoms that may occur are:
- Anxiety / Depression
- Feeling overwhelmed
- Being emotionally dysregulated
- Sleep disturbances
- Coping through alcohol and/or drugs
- Feeling overwhelmed
- Loss of confidence and self-respect
All these symptoms can lead to erectile dysfunction, as you need a stable mind to be able to get or maintain an erection.
Erectile dysfunction can be a sign of infidelity but could also be a result of physical or phycological factors. It’s important to encourage your partner to get help by either a therapist or doctor.
If Infidelity occurs this doesn’t always mean that there is something wrong in the relationship. It can be a result of an individual’s inability to communicate their deepest desires and needs. It can also be a result of inner trauma or self-confidence reflected through their behaviour. Relationships can survive if both parties are willing to do the work, seek help with a therapist and continue to uphold a level of respect and compassion for one another.